***
I love my daughter. I love her more that life itself. But enough with the poop already!
Before I had my daughter I had a certain abhorrence to poop. I've never had to look at anyone's but my own, so I've never been schooled in the way of poop. So aside from the fact that this little munchkin doesn't nothing else but poop, I really don't know what to do with it.
According to the books I've read, newborn poop is fairly small in size and the way it smells depends on what they eat. Breastfed babies are supposed to have almost sweet smelling poop. Formula fed babies poop is slightly stronger with the consistency of paste, but generally not that bad. That is what the books and the magazines say. I double checked.
So what exactly is wrong with my daughter?!? Her shit stinks! It not the newborn type shit that you can just laugh about. It's adult type shit stinky. And she only poops once a week it seems, so when she does poop it oozes out the sides of her diaper. It's like Huggies isn't stronger enough to contain the secret of the ooze. I thought about getting her a bigger size diaper but I don't want her getting any new ideas about a bigger diaper meaning she can hold off on shitting for two weeks and really fill it up.
Now most people when faced with the situation are revolted, disgusted, etc. Pick any synonym. However, I can't stop laughing about it, and apparently neither can she.
Our latest incident was today about 6:30 pm. I was reading an article to her about the latest on the No Child Left Behind Act, when all of a sudden she started grunting. She looked like she was concentrating really hard. Then, I realized that was her poopy face. So I told her while she poop Mommy was going to write a blog. Well, a couple minutes later she is still grunting like a little piggy and a certain smell begins to permeate my room. I start to crack up. I've never known a seven week old to have such strong poop! As soon as she starts smiling and cooing sans the grunting, I know I have my work cut out for me. And just as a precaution I lift up her legs to check the sides of her diaper and sure enough, no matter how well I center her little bottom on the diaper, poop oozes out.
I definitely need to invest in a gas mask, and write the makers of the Diaper Genie a long thank you note. Tweets by @JackieMichele
